Brand: Nike
COPY: Pushkaraj Shirke
Art: Sameer Ketkar
This is my new ad for my portfolio. The mindblowing artwork is done in graffitti style by my pal Sameer Ketkar a.k.a Sammy - one of the best art guys in the industry.
The copy and concept is mine. Thanks to him it screams out sharp the way it does.
The breaks in the copy are on purpose for a broken - tired - fatigued yet 'attitude' feel that comes across in the ad - even in the artwork.
Being a guy who BREATHES sports... tired of the commercialization of my religion {sports} ... tired of the brand brigades... i needed an ad that was allllllll pure sport------ So this was the ad i just had to make!
Do let us know your comments.
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Very Bad. thats the first thing that comes to my mind. very amateurish, Dude hope nobody else sees it. take it off. and look up some great advertising done by nike, headline still has some promise but copy...
ReplyDeleteone more point never lead your audience with ur own take on ur ad. let them review it with an open mind. if u really want an honest comment.
and grungy art doesn't mean good art.
good. Thank you vishal.
ReplyDeletehowever it is, im not taking it off.
thanks for the advice.
i wonder if u hide your face because SOME ppl find u ugly..
hmm..
neways. Thanks.
Awesome work! its my desktop now! DJ Sam is the best! and your lines do justice to the art and vice versa! Good Job!
ReplyDeletehey bud..cool ad re!!!!
ReplyDeletebut from you i expect more..
super work!!!!
few suggestions (iam not qualified but still)too many words re!!!
and iam a fan of "all sport no games" iam sure u have heard this before!!
go ahead amaze us !!!keep rocking!!
On first look..it says "fire and energy and will"..maybe even passion.. but the copy doesnt match the look of the work... i wouldnt mind reading stronger words..crisper words...it does catch the eye... overall,good work....it can be mindblowing though..
ReplyDeletecheers !!
I like the idea of "Keep the rules, break the limits" but some of the copy still needs work.
ReplyDeleteFirst, what I liked :
"... The winner, the loser. They all make it to the bell. But you decide what you finish as." - Pearl of wisdom !
"The rules restrict. The rules bind. But you are free." - Simple and clear !
"Most often it's the sport that plays you...but sometimes...you can play the sport." - this gives the 'exclusivity' you really need ! (Basically - if you use our products, you can play the sport instead of being one of the masses that lets it take over)
Things that still need work :
1) The word 'freakkin' needs to go. It speaks to a certain market, and I'm no expert, but when I see it in an ad, I immediately think of Indian males 20-25 of the rock scene/call centre persuasion. The double 'k' cements this.
The word is also offensive to some people. Be careful with slang in advertisements. You don't want to miss out on a substantial part of your audience - athletes being generally outside the aforementioned group - due to the use of slang.
2) Towards the end, it's almost all the same. Not ITS almost all the same. Watch your apostrophes :)
2b) "Every time" should be two words.
3) "Choose really hard" rubs me the wrong way. You can either choose or not choose. Not something that takes a lot of effort. (Mental effort, yes, but in a short ad, people won't have time to think about that.) Rewording this thought might help, but I really do like the idea.
4) "Your limits are free" ... when I think "Keep the rules, break the limits" .. I think of world record breakers, people who push themselves past their own capacity to do and be something more than has ever been done. The limits don't START free - or at least they are not perceived as doing so... Maybe move from this thought?
Not bad though ! I would not tell you to take it down - just correct some grammatical mistakes and phrase a few things just a little differently...
most of it may be a matter of personal taste but that 'freakkin' really jars the reader - made me think more about the ad than the product...if you have to take one suggestion from me on phraseology, please do remove that.
Trilliana! nice! :)
ReplyDeleteintense :)
ok-- here goes--
1) FREAKKIN! --- that was one word i used on PURPOSE! (even its spelling's incompleteness) it's frustration. it's the voice of a person pushed to the limit. Try pushing yourself to a limit where u cant breathe and cant hold yourself still.. u shiver and tremble and every breath hurts---- im sure you'll find non-dictionary words creeping into your speech.
try it- coz i've done that more than a thousand times now. And its always the same.
Someone else too pointed it out to me. ut i let it be. so 'Freakkin' was purely on purpose.
2) "Towards the end, it's almost all the same. Not ITS almost all the same. Watch your apostrophes :)
2b) "Every time" should be two words.-------- this i completely agree is my fuck up!"
thanks for pointing it out :)
my 'gremmer' really sucks!
did u know i used to fail in grammar tests?? (and damn! im copywriting now! hee hee)
3) "Choose really hard" : every sports person chooses to win. do you know any good sportsperson who chooses to lose? what makes a difference is "how hard you choose the same". the one that chooses harder toils harder. pushes harder. and eventually - plays harder.. thean the one who just simply chose to play.
4) "Your limits are free" : that means that you decide how far you can push your limits. Their extent is free. Limts or the so called bounds are actually boundless - its YOUR thought that creates them to a specification.
So.... YOUR LIMITS are 'FREE'
hmmm--- so except for he copy typos--- i guess all will remain the same :)]
thanks sooooooooooooooo much for ur comments trilly :)
muah! :)
thank uuuuuuuu :)
i agree with vishal.... its bad... it'll catch your eye but it'll sell nothing...
ReplyDeletei dnt even like the visual... it has nothing to do with the headline (which btw is the only thing thts super!)
shruti has it on her desktop but even after lookin at it all day long, she's not gonna go and get nike...
guess you dont understand what advertising is.
ReplyDeleteits not always about selling something--- if that was advertising- most ads would be just yelling of discounts.
advertisng is more about buoilding an image - building an identity - especially when it comes to nice brands.
and thats what this ad is.
btw--- if you have seen nike ads---- do try and show me a single ad that 'SELLS'.
i'll be obliged :)
(now im not at all surprised that you arent in advertising)
:)
Oh the little girl is upset!! Can't take criticism ha, poor thing. Because if u cant, then probably u don't belong here. And then u decide to get personal. U know what, i'd rather hide my face because SOME think it's ugly, rather than not show my face around bcos i do bad work.
ReplyDeleteBtw nice picture. Nice face. Wud love to smash it someday.
One last thing, i wasnt going to get personal, but then i saw an excellent NIKE ad that read,
Just do it.
Hi Pushkaraj!
ReplyDeleteUmmm... bout this ad, well, first of all, since you are looking for honest feedback, let the work speak for itself.
This here has scope, esp the headline and bits of the copy. But still, HUGE amounts of work needed.
The visual does absolutely nothing for the idea. It's more like a fashion pic than anything to do with sport.
The headline's good, but the copy is taking me nowhere. It's not bringing forth/taking forward the 'breaking limits' idea.
N no matter how u try to justify 'freakkin'. It jus doesn't work man.
N YES, try refraining from making personal comments bout people. There are some limits u shouldn't break!
- Sandesh
lol
ReplyDeletei didnt get personal at all.
"if some one dosent like your face dosent mean you go and hide it" is a quotation
i just used it coz it fit here and altered the words.
i dont even know who the guy is - forget what he looks like!
u takin things too personally man, chill - u r free to hold your opinion.
u fight like a kid! :)
this is makin me laff now!
Lol,
ReplyDeleteUr ad makes me laugh too.
Lol, lol, and some more lol.
Have fun.
Well I liked the copy as it is adhering to the very much Nike style…the attitude part of u. but as u said dude that u wanted to bring that alllllll pure sport feel to it I just cud not see that. It gives me a feel tht u r talking about passion n I knw tht sports is passion for many but passion can be of many types n so it needs to be clear tht we r talking abt the passion tht is sports.
ReplyDeleteAlso that Nike is not navratan tail (oil) it has some standards and a strategy that all their ads follow…all their ads depict clearly that it is sports. Its is passion. And that, “Just do it”. What I feel is that sport think is not coming across.
Cheers!!
Hey Pushkaraj, another bit I'd like to add here.
ReplyDeleteYou don't need to write NIKE.
The 'SWOOSH' is an icon in itself.
- Sandesh
sandesh, the swoosh most defintely and obviously was an option- its was teh first thing on my mind in fact.
ReplyDeletebut i avoided it - so did sam
coz its just too overdone and subtle - we wanted something that came out loud again.
NILE along with the swoosh was typically nike in the mid nike campaigns - we thot it wud be great to have it back
its an icon - and its Loud :)
wah wah wah....
ReplyDeletemommy mommy they tell me my ad is baddddd.... mommy i am just gonna insult them all and show them...
at least i'll be good at insulting... if not at advertising...
wah wah wah...
btw i like the fact that you are egoistic... its goood... a creative person has to be egoistic...
ReplyDeleteits your ego that'll motivate you to not only do something creative but also defend it like you're doing out here...
good che! keep it up!
Irshad Irshad...
ReplyDeletelol
ReplyDeleteif critism ever shook me... i wud have just deleted the comments.
i love criticism... coz it often helps...
and even when it dosent, it often shows others weaknesses ;)
(coz u see, u poke most at whats weakest within you)
neways-- i loved the chow chow
hee hee
have fun :)
talk about storm in a tea cup, a portfolio ad is a portfolio ad.. I do not take it so seriously when its not mine.... try to chill guys.... anyways... about the ad in question... I consider copy and visuals together...personally i think headline is just fine.. the visuals do nothing to support the thought or its explanation.. it might well have been any other sports brand.. not particularly nike... I like the flow of thoughts in long copy but all in all, this is great material for a promotions not as a print ad for Nike.. The whole upside down headline approach is great.. the rugged looks go with the message but one strong visual would have taken it to next level... even if it was by using face of a sports personality who is saying these words...So much in the name of analysis
ReplyDeleteAll in all pushy its good but not the best from u... i have sincerely critqued it and thats why am not worried about u getting back at me with insults or others commenting on my comment...
best of luck in future to rise above these setbacks and to produce a award winning work with your team...
Take care,
Prafs,
PS: The pride that youi take in your work and courage to open it to all for feedback are great qualities , don't give up on them
Pushkaraj u say you are a copywriter with flawed grammar, and take pride in it????
ReplyDeleteDon't ever come to me with your portfolio.
not only is my grammar messy--- but im also Dyslexic.
ReplyDeleteand i take utmost pride in it.
an dont worry, i'd never bring my portfolio to you - i'd consider it an insult to be judged by a man who thinks copywriting is about grammar.
the way i've known my job- copywriting is about marketing, creativity and ideas than just "theoretically correct" language.
and for your kindest information - i've worked for more than 6 agencies - and i still continue to do so.
chillax.
Hey Pushkaraj........ I studied this ad according to the company prospects and its positioning.... and u know wat.... u are a genoius.... this is wat the company wants to position itself currently...... man hats off to u... always tried my hand in printads but cudnt make out........ but ya learnt the Video part of it..... man i want u to teach me this kala.. the art of makin them.... lolz.... will just tell u one thing man keep on creating such mindblowing ads and I gaurantee u that no one can stop u from becuming Mr.Prahlad Kakkar II........ my wishes and blessings to u.... hatts offff!!!! man
ReplyDeleteIm sure none of ur 6 agencies were/are JWT, O&M, LOWE, Euro, Leo, Rediff, McCann or even Everest for that matter. And after seeing ur below par ad, flawed grammar and ur over inflated ego, im so sure u'll never make it.
ReplyDeleteBtw, ive worked for 2 of the above agencies. And still continue to do so.
There r small fishes in big pond, big fishes in a small pond and u, small fish - smaller pond.
ah! ignorance speaks :)
ReplyDeletelol
chill man! u'd really do well with some reality checks :)
[and yes, theres a difference between respect and ego.. u'd do well learning that difference]
sheesh! this feels stupid- lecturing an adult on behaviour! phew!
all the best man! hope u dont fail in life, trying to make it big in the world! really hope so.
luck!
Indeed, ignorance speaks. Im already doing quite well, thank you.
ReplyDeleteAnd now perhaps you know just how maddening it was lecturing a 'copywriter' on copywriting (given that am an Art Director). I hope you have learnt from these lectures. because frankly am tiring of all this effort. Coz u simply aint worth.
So besta luck with your fantasy land. And even better luck to your 'awestruck admirers'. You guys need it, seriously.
PS: There is an opening at Dattaram Advertising. A 7th agency, perhaps...
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
The reason most losers lost was coz they were busy 'looking down' upon others.
ReplyDeleteand heyyy! now i see what ticked u off!
ReplyDeletejealously!
lollllllll
u cudnt quite take it that i considered my pal sammy to be one of the best art guys in the industry!!!!
lol
u r funny man!
let me tell you- he is one hell of an artist! and his art rocks!
most importantly- he is one hell of a person. and thats what it takes to lead an amazing life.
unfortunately- ur jealously ruins you too far to be able to percieve it... so what the hell.
swooosh! rest in peace :)
im really lovin this!
damn! this is fun!
My my my...this is fun! Ive the best 5 mins of my life at this blog. Only the intial 30 seconds were painful, and those 30 secs were spent in reading the ad.
ReplyDeleteOtherwise ive had fun. Good fun. Vish, i think u shd just let it be. It's not worth it. This guy knows nothing, seriously nothing. And the people who are busy admiring his ads are guys who dont even know that prahlad is a film maker. He doesnt do print ads. So in that sense, i do hope that Mr. Shirke goes on to become the Prahlad. Becasue thankfully for him, he has non dyslexic writers who write grammatically correct good films for him. Pushkaraj, hire a writer man. U need it.
PS: One spelling mistake in an ad equals to zero payment from the client to the agency. And if it's a nationwide release, the agency is doomed. But i dont think that you know that, because a nationwide release usually happens in a bigger agency.
Cheers!
thanks smartest alec :)
ReplyDeleteand thats exactly what im doing- im doing film direction rite now---
and yes-- i do have proof readers who manage the grammar for me.
this ad was made within 3 hrs - therefore obviously no proofreading.
and yes, for your kindest information, i have had nationwide realeases.
guys guys, grow up people. u r embarrassing urselves!
The ad that won a grand prix last year took 8 months to make. And at the end of 8 months the creators of the ad were not happy with the final output...bcoz it was time for the award entries they had to send it.
ReplyDelete8 months v/s 3 hrs. Who are u kidding dude. U ad is nothing but a piece of thrash. And the more u defend it, the clearer it is that this is probably the best u can do.
PS: The writer who won the grand prix dint get his ad checked by a proof reader.
smartest_alec
ah! nice trivia!
ReplyDeleteP.S: bye bye :)
dude...u deleted my comments from the latest post. this is against free-comments-for-the-dumb.
ReplyDeleteAnd here you hypocritically say i dont delete criticism.
langda, if u onbserve, i havent deleted a single comment here - coz THIS is open for comment. This is public.
ReplyDeletewhere as the one where u posted ur comment earlier was meant for someone.
do u understand the difference? i hope you do.
you may post whatever you like on this page or anyothe (anyother that is not dedicated to someone else)
kindly don not scribe on something thats are clearly specified to be for someone else.
thats respect.
who's the guy in the ad, why wud nike have him in the first place.. as makes no sense.. too much copy for a brand that speaks for itself?.. no swoosh for the ad..
ReplyDeletemaking an ad with big words and too many full stops for a big brand wont really do u any good.
im bored.. and i knw he is gonna get back at me too now, yawn.. just do it :P
im breaking stereotypes - i wanted a copy intensive ad. Nike is tired of speaking for itself - i was adding another dimension to it.
ReplyDeletei saw all w&k ads... and most of them were not even up to my mark as a sports man.
i found them to be just good displays of expensive yt excellent photography. and dry words.
hence i tried my diversion.
neways, i'd love to see your work man.
show me what u'd make for nike.
also do share some really good W&K nike ads wid me yaar..
i'd like to learn
Guys guys please leave the poor fellow alone. u have to know the difference between people, some like criticism (they use it to improve their work), some just can't take it.
ReplyDeletethe way he is defending his work says it all, save ur valuable inputs for something worthy.
theres a difference between criticism thats worth a consideration and respect... and criticism that's crap.
ReplyDeleteI got the reviews i needed. I got the views i wanted. I got the inputs that were necessary.
--- more importantly - from the 3 people that mattered the most.
for the rest - it dosent really matter.
adios.
Bravo bravo! Brownie point no 11, 12, 13.
ReplyDeletesmartest_alec
All the people in this conversation please warn ur unsuspecting CDs that be wary of this guy. His one ad caused so much furore, he will start a world war if they criticize his portfolio.
ReplyDeletedude i dunno wer u work but THIS is the industry, wer mediocre work is always trashed. take it in ur stride.
and if u want to know wer ur ad really stands upload it on 'Desicreative'
thanks man :)
ReplyDeletei will in due course :)
and yes - i am fiercely protective about my work. I can take constructive criticism - but i wont stand some one or any one for that matter asking me to TAKE SOMETHING OFF or to hide it.
Coz for me - i respect my work, i respect the efforts of my colleagues to work on it to make it complete... so in the end, however it may be - it is an expression of US.
If i put it up, i believe nobody else has te right to tell me to take it off.
And Thats what i believe in.
and thats how it shall always be.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteU will figure out sooner or later that industry doesn't work that way.
ReplyDeleteU should realise that u work as a problem solver, client has problems wich advertising tries to solve.
Wer does fiercely protecting ur work figure in this...
u should probably try cave painting
wer u and ur work can live in peace.
I have come across stubborn clients who want their way with everything, but 80% of the times i have managed to get our ad across.
ReplyDeleteCoz the way it goes, clients always believe that they are the only ones who work and everyone else is stupid - they rarely have respect for the agency ppl who slog their ass behind coming up wid something that'll sell their product.
My protective streak comes from those experiences.
Like my clients, I have nothing against vish - and esp nothing personal - all i say is that one shudnt ask someone to TAKE OFF a piece of work.
Crticize, yes.
But do NOT disrespect it.
Coz ppl have put their efforts behind it.
and like everything else in life that requires effort, even that piece of work carries an emotional value.
[and about cave painting--- yes-- i NEVER sell my paintings. Coz yes, those are for me. Not for the masses. and i understand and value that.]
thanks for your contrbution.
respect.
U paint too??? U must be making a lot of money during the diwali and the wedding season.
ReplyDeleteSend me u no, my house need some touching up too.
Cheers :)
smartest_alec
lollll
ReplyDeletesure man. netime ;)
hee hee
and now that the attention is off his ad and is on him, he is loving it all the more... and damn he is one big hottie, considering that he modelled himself for his precious ad... damn funny laugh riot... too cool
ReplyDelete:P
lolllllllll
ReplyDeleteu bet i love attention :P
im a narcissist.
but that aint the purpose behind me modelling for my ad - its just a matter of convieniences there.
find me a celebrity to model - and i'll be obliged to throw him in :)
and btw-- that was my art director's decision, not mine.
further more, if sports is the question-- go check my records and background-- u mite be in for a big surprise.
tum bahut confuje ho bhaiya. 2/3 jagah interview pe jaayiye aur dekhiye ki aap kitne peeche hai.
ReplyDeleteyaad rakhe, khali matki shor kare zyada
and talking about narcissm (chek the spelling) or vainglory, u betta look yourself in the mirror and keep repeating what you just said.
- problogger
Hey man don't u think u r a bit late.
ReplyDeletenike has said it all, and done it all.
now they even don't say 'just do it'
where r u???
and now u will come back with lame reason wich made u do this ad.
go ahead humour me
- the soul of bill bernbach
hahaha, laugh riot.. m serious this guy is out to kill us all. :)
ReplyDeletei'd love to kill.
ReplyDeletebut you wont be worth it.
:)