Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Love, Lust, and Life.

Loving, is wanting to give and give
                      till there's nothing left but emptiness,
lusting is wanting to take and take
                      till there's nothing more left to take,
the 'perfect' relationship is one that has both in a measure of balance.
                      But from what i've known,
the 'perfect' relationship is not an ideal relationship
                      in a world that requires conformity
only of simplicity and uncomplicatedness.
                      and such, is life.

-Pushkaraj Shirke

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

sad romance - violins of smoke

Title: Sad Romance
Artist: Thao Nyugen Xanh
Director: Pushkaraj Shirke

This is the first cut of my experiment with smoke vids. Will be uploadinhg the final version later.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Runaway Stray

It's late in the night. A yellow glow of halogens envelopes the dark roads in a mocking golden sheen. He sits by the roadside. Alone. It's a place he's known too well all his life. Not the roadside, the other place.

It confuses him still of why it feels this way. He still dosent understand how he feels. His tail still wags in happiness, he still rolls over when pet, he still struts on all four feet - but how does he explain himself what the emptiness is that he feels. The emptiness that he himself traded for, to see her happy. Wasn't the happiness supposed to fill in that emptiness? Or was that just something he had hoped for to give him the courage to do what he did?

He had run away from the one home he had found in a long long time. And run, run and run he did till his paws hurt. His white fur was white no more, all dusty and greased, he was hardly the pet he'd come to be. He was again the stray he always had been. But this time atleast it didn't hurt so much. Coz he knew it would help her stay happy. Would she cry? Of course she would. But he believes her tears would heal in a few days and then she'll be happy forver and after. She'll find the happiness she deserves. And a pet who can be more appropriate for her home. And one that wouldn't make as many troubles as him. Or bark as much. Or behave like a street dog - a mongrel - an untamed, waywardly mannered cur like him. Or that is atleast what he believed. He had to.

He still quitely watches her sometimes, from a distance. Knowing that she won't recognize him anymore. He's torn away the collar, but buried it in a place where only he knows where. He still digs it up sometimes - he can smell her on it. And he keeps it close. He watches her smile now and then, without wagging his tail. not to give away the happiness he still feels just to watch her smile. It's what makes the emptiness he still feels a little more bearable. It's what gives him the strength to still keep running on those throbbing paws of his.
Running away from his happiness, and towards her happily ever after.

As he sits in the far away place he has come to know so well. He's still fighting a war with all that he feels. But he dosen't care what the world thinks of him. They may call him a stray all they want. But he knows he's diferent. He's a runaway stray.

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