Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Crash.. and live.




The sun was easy that day. wasnt burning as it usually does. the job was done- just a freelance work- just a little more money on a saturday afternoon. The way back home was tempting in a different way. But he felt lifeless.. like something within him was missing... maybe it was just the consciousness of life... or maybe just that spark that makes one feel alive. It had been a long time since that day in heaven when he had felt so alive. The only thing now that made him feel something at the moment was the purr of the150cc engine that was growing louder everytime he kissed the wind a little more.

Neutral. The traffic was as usual on a sunny saturday afternoon. the signals were in place. the helmet was on. and the black panther seemed beckoning for one free wild run. The chance came on. The signal turned green and the streets cleared out as he roared past the frontrunners in the herd. 70 kmph. it was a sail. cutting around the few cars that came ahead until the long clear highway that spread across like a red carpet to life. 80 kmph.

Click. the fourth gear slid under his feet as smooth as the poised claws of a cat ready to pounce. Blur. 100 kmph. The purring pussycats on the other side of the road just seemed a blur fro the visor of the focussed helmet. The panther was sparking life. Like a gush of water from the cracked wall of a dam that held back more than it ever really could. The block now lay just ahead. as a cattle mooed side by side covering the carpet all across. but for one edge on the wrong side of the street. A split second. A decision. Click. zipped across the edge n out right onto the open concrete n tar that lay ahead. far far away from the next signal.

120 kmph. the wind was now sparking little bursts of life within him. 120 kmph. the final gear. going steady blazing the path. feeling half alive. still on the left side to avoid the cattle. btttttrrrrrrrr.... it jumped out from the edges right onto the road. a jackrabbit start. straight in the path. INEVITABLE.

Fuck the brakes. Slide sideways. rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr........ Crashhhhhh...rrrrrrrrrrr..... off the bike and almost onto the road - just a moment before contact... life was in. ALIVE. as he thudded n slid along the road he saw the sparks flying off the bike's steel silencer that was still clawing at the road ahead of him in desperation. Standing up with blood all across his arms... he felt a smile across his face he simply couldnt explain. A rush of life that felt like GOD. Picked the helmet that had rolled across, smiled at the petrified rishawdriver "hota hai, koi baat nahi" he said. The rishaw driver breathed a sigh of relief as the people come over ready to thrash him backed off at the statement.

Life. it felt like life once again. She was there. A flash through his mind. and he knew what had kept him alive. He had felt alive again. but now he had to live on too. He had a wait ahead of him to live through. The smile was still there. and it didnt seem like it was going to leave again.

He had crashed into a realisation. he had crashed... into life.

-Pushkaraj Shirke

1 comment:

  1. mansi majithia

    dont knw why i read thru the blog..just to find out...wat happnd to u..in tat accident..i hav alwaz knwn..u hav ths weird a strange way of publicising ur stupidity...but..wen i read thru......i met something i knew..something i felt long back..a real long time back...a girl who fel 14 feet frma building..a girl who was knew wat is it gona b the min she reached the ground....a smile on her face....a min b4 she painfuly landed...a girl in 3rd standard....was smiling..wen she fell....wen she got up from her 5 hour coma...her family realised she lost her memory...considering the fact that she called her mum "aunty"...lol...but its was fr just few hours..she got back...healthy as ever..lol.probably more healthy thnh needed..and till date..remebers her adventure of falling down..14 feet...today u reminded me of that girl..who used to proudly show ppl..how she fell...that girl is me;)

    thnx..

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